:-(

Tomorrow is the day.
We are putting Cammy down.
I have been going back and forth all day about having made this decision.
I know its the right thing to do, and I know I have been saying the same thing all week.
I'm sure that my doubts are all because I don't want to do it.
And that is selfish.
I don't want to take her in.
I don't want to listen to her cry because she is in the car and I am basically driving her to her death.
I hate it.
Hate it.
Hate it.
Hate it.
I guess this is all part of being a pet owner.
Having to take care of them in the good times, and know when it is time to end the bad.
Why couldn't she have just gone in her sleep?
Because that would have been too easy.
Why should I have it easy?
I know so many people who have had to put their pets down.
I don't want to join them.
I'm just sick about it.
I keep thinking....maybe she can make it to her 20th Birthday in March.
Maybe I should just wait until then.
But then I start thinking about her peeing on the floor.
And not eating.
And struggling when she does eat.
And how it looks so painful when she walks.
Then I know I have made the right decision.
But I don't have to like it......